


Refractory

by Muserobbin



Series: Where Does the Good Go [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, College Student Peter Parker, M/M, Mutual Pining, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Smut, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-02-23 12:35:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23711602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Muserobbin/pseuds/Muserobbin
Summary: It's been a year since their fateful meeting at the B&B in Maine, and Peter Parker is now a college student at NYU. The forces that be put Peter and Tony Stark in each other's paths again. Will they rekindle their romance, or will they resist?*Don't read until you've read Labor Day* (Though it could also work as a standalone tbh)
Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Series: Where Does the Good Go [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1671178
Comments: 20
Kudos: 89





	1. Spiral

**Author's Note:**

> I'm super excited to begin this next installment in the series, 'Where does the good go?' I'm so in love with part 2 that it is ridiculous. There will be so much pining and angst... Without further ado, enjoy!

It arrived in the mail. 

The envelope’s return address was for May Parker at La Mer. Inside, was the photo that appeared in the guestbook on the front table in the B&B. It was the only photo of the pair. There they were, Peter in the sunglasses Tony had bought for him behind the wheel of the Audi. Tony was in the passenger seat, fondly staring at the boy. It was written plain as day on his face even then. For the thousandth time, he wondered how May hadn’t threatened his life. 

Maybe that was the breaking point.

_I’m fine I’m fine I’m fine._

He had been chanting this to himself since he had driven away. How had he let himself get so attached? He simply didn’t know. He hadn’t even thought he could feel this way after Steve. But he was wrong. Oh, was he wrong. This was worse.

It was worse because the kid hadn’t left him. He knew that Peter would be more than willing to take him back if he just said the word. No one had left him. He had done all the leaving this time.

But think about the kid. This was all just a fling. Don’t get the kid’s hopes up only to go back to Pepper. She was the only real alternative. The world wasn’t ready for Tony Stark to be gay with a 17-year-old on his arm. _He_ wasn’t ready to be gay with a 17-year-old on his arm. 

“Are you okay, Mr. Stark?” Okoye would ask him.

“I’m fine.”

After about the third time of her asking, she mumbled under her breath, “Remind me never to let you go on vacation.”

But Peter was everywhere.

He was in his morning coffee. He was in a muffin in a bakery window. He was in every movie. He was in every man. He was in every woman.

I’m fine I’m fine I’m fine.

Nowadays, 

He preferred tea. He preferred bagels. He preferred books. He preferred his right hand. He preferred his left hand.

Tony had been avoiding Rhodey. He only did this when he knew Rhodey wouldn’t approve of whatever lifestyle decision he was making at the moment. He knew this, and Rhodey knew this. So, he wasn’t surprised when Rhodey showed up after blowing off another gym session.

Knock knock knock.

He sighed and put down the book he had been reading.

“Can I help you?”

Rhodey gazed at him in annoyance, “Yeah, my friend keeps blowing me off. We’re supposed to be going to the gym. Men in their forties need to stay on top of these things. It’s good. It’s healthy.”

Tony cringed at the ‘men in their forties’ part.

“I’m fine.”

“I don’t remember asking”

Rhodey pushed past him into the penthouse. He took in his surroundings. The book, the bagel, the teacup.

“Since when do you drink tea?”

“Um... it’s a recent thing. I’m on a little health kick. You know, men in their… At our age we need to watch the coffee.”

Rhodey just looked at him.

“I’m fine.”

“You don’t look fine.”

Tony sat in the chair. “Maybe I’m fine. Maybe I’m not. What are you, my shrink?”

Rhodey shook his head at him, chin resting in palm. “No. Nuh uh.”

“What?”

“We aren’t doing this. Get you goddam shoes on. Now.”

“Fu- why?!”

“Cause I said so.”

He was using his ‘I’m serious, motherfucker’ military voice.

Tony liked to pretend he wasn’t afraid of it, so he sighed exaggeratedly, “Yes, dear.”

“Tony, I’m not joking,” Rhodey called as Tony made his way to the bedroom. “Thirty seconds.”

“Thirty seconds? What do I look like, tinker bell?”

“Twenty-nine, twenty-eight, twenty-seven.”

“At least let me brush my teeth,” he scoffed.

“Yeah, it’s probably been a week.” 

“So, are you going to tell me what’s been going on?”

They were running through the park near the penthouse. Well, Rhodey was running. Tony was lagging behind and in serious need of an inhaler even though he had never used one in his life.

Tony puffed out air, struggling to keep up. “Nope… not a...a chance.”

“You went on vacation, and you came back a different person.”

“Can… we talk… about this… over… lunch or something? Oh God! I have a cramp.”

Rhodey shook his head as his friend bent over and rested his hands on his knees. “Jesus, Tony.”

So, they were sitting in a cafe, menus open. Tony was perusing the lunch options. Rhodey had already ordered. The server was waiting for the other’s decision. 

“Just one more second.”

“Do you need another minute?” The server asked anxiously looking towards her other tables.

“We need another minute,” Rhodey interjected.

“I’ll come ba-”

“Nope! There we go.” Tony looked seriously into the server’s eyes. “I would like the Hawaiian chicken tacos, hold the mango, extra pineapple, extra mayo. For my side, sweet potato fries.” He turned to Rhodey. “That’s semi-healthy, right?”

“Just,” Rhodey put a hand up to stop his friend’s chattering. He smiled extra politely at the server. “That’ll be all. Thank you.”

He waited until she was out of earshot.

“Tony, what the hell is going on with you? As I stated before, you went on vacation and came back a different person.” Rhodey threw his hands up in bewilderment. “You’re depressed, you’re sad, you’re anxious.” He leaned forward, lowering his voice. “You’ve gained weight.”

Tony covered his eyes with his hand. “I met somebody.”

“Okay? So, what’s the issue? You’re like the richest guy in the country. Travel shouldn’t be a problem for you. If anything, bring her here. I’m sure she won’t mind if you play the whole sugar daddy thing. Anything, literally, anything would be better than this.” He gestured to his friend now. 

Tony pointed at him, “Trust me on this one. You don’t want to know. And it’s a ‘he’, just so you know. You shouldn’t make assumptions like that. It’s not polite.”

Rhodey leaned back giving him a doubtful look. “I’m sorry. I thought that after Steve… I thought it was a one-time thing.”

“Keep your voice down!” He hissed looking around.

“Nobody’s paying attention, Tony.”

“Well,” Tony adjusted his collar then the silverware on the table. “It wasn’t. And if you must know. If you really must know, he’s on the young side.”

“How young are we talking here?” If it was possible, Rhodey looked even more concerned for his friend.

“I don't know. I didn’t carbon date him. The young side.”

“Tony…” he warned.

“S...teen.”

Rhodey put a finger to his ear tilting his head to the side. “I’m sorry, what was that? Cause it sounded like you just said something crazy.”

Tony took a sip of water and set his glass down staring into the little rivets in the crystal. “Seventeen.”

“Jesus, Tony.”

The server reappeared. “Are we doing okay over here?”

“I think we would like our food to-go. Thank you so much.”

They were back in Tony’s apartment sitting in the living room, their empty takeout boxes littering the coffee table. Tony was mentally preparing himself for the much-needed reality check from his friend.

“Told you going out was a bad idea.”

Rhodey sighed and reached for the book Tony had laid on the armrest of his chair earlier that morning. Tony didn’t say anything, resigned to the inevitable discovery. He cracked the book open, the bookmark being the picture of Peter and Tony. He cringed when his friend got his hands on it.

“This him?”

Tony nodded, hand on his mouth.

“I’m not saying I condone this. But I can see the attraction.” He held the photo up to the light. He smirked at his friend.

“What?” Tony’s cheeks actually had the nerve to redden, like he was a teenager with a crush that his friend was teasing him about.

“Look at you, blushing. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re in love.”

Tony scoffed. “Alright, give it here.”

Rhodey reluctantly handed the photo back which Tony immediately began checking for fingerprints. The other watched in mild amusement but mostly concerned. He hung around through the afternoon, Tony thought no-doubt to make sure he was mentally stable enough to be alone. The verdict must have been that he was.

When his friend left for the evening, he curled onto his side, picture propped against his bedside lamp. His friend’s words revolved around his head. ‘I thought after Steve. I thought it was a one-time thing.’ It was too painful to think about, but undeniably, there were similarities between the way he was handling the aftermath. What he couldn’t understand was that it was in fact the same. But Steve had hurt _him_ , and he had hurt Peter. He left him without even a phone number because he was scared. He couldn’t give Peter the relationship he needed. It wasn’t fair that to Peter that he was struggling with this part of his identity.

It would be easy to call La Mer, give his number to Peter. It had been weeks though, and in teenage years, that was months. The kid had probably moved on or was in the process of making headway to move on. It would be selfish of Tony to call now, two months later. He was a selfish man.

However, it was the photo that kept him from picking up the phone and making that call. The way it had ended was too perfect. They had the other in their minds, end of summer light on each other’s faces, dim lit lovemaking in their fantasies.

If he couldn’t have Peter Parker, maybe he could fantasize. He dipped his hands under the covers. One hand was him fucking Peter. The other hand was Peter fucking him. So many Peters. Not one could he have.

He returned to his morning workouts the following day.

⸎

_One Year Later_

Peter had been living in New York all of two months. The city was a vast contrast to life in Maine. He had begun school at NYU this fall and stayed at a little apartment with Ned a few miles off campus. Overall, he was enjoying the fast-paced lifestyle he had created for himself. His gap year had only seemed to serve one purpose: To get over Tony. Yet, he would have never met Tony if he hadn’t decided to take a gap year. He couldn’t decide if it was the best or worst thing to happen to him. It had been a painful recovery process that could’ve been entirely avoided.

There was no way to contact the businessman, Tony Stark. His private number was well-protected. Even if he did contact the office, he was sure the man didn’t want to hear from him. He would’ve called by now if he did.

One day, Ned, MJ, and Peter were sitting outside in the sunshine between classes. It had been exactly a year since La Mer. Peter was having a difficult time focusing on the theorem in front of him while Ned chattered next to him about the latest Star Wars film news. MJ tapped his arm and held up a drawing of him.

There he was, laid on the grass, chin in hand, staring into the middle distance which was neither here nor there because he was on a beach with Tony hundreds of miles away. Tony cast a line, then, feeling Peter’s gaze on him, he turned to smile at the younger. His eyes shaded but not hidden underneath blue lenses.

She didn’t comment but put the sketchbook back down and continued shading the circles under his eyes. He gave her a funny look.

“They can’t be that bad.”

MJ shrugged and Ned chose this time to interject himself. “Trust me, dude. You’re depressed.”

“I am not,” he scoffed turning his gaze back to the theorem. Without looking, he knew the other two were sharing a concerned look above his head.

He had always imagined what it would be like running into Tony amongst the hustle and bustle. It would be on his walk from the subway to the little apartment. Their shoulders would bump causing Peter’s books to tumble out of his bag. The man would already be in the process of retrieving the scattered books while the crowd went impatiently around them. The only thing Peter would see was a salt and pepper head. Someone would pass between them into the store adjacent. Then, finally, his face would be revealed. Tony Stark.

The pair would exchange a long sorrowful look as memories passed through their minds like dancing ghosts. Peter would open his mouth to begin speaking but would notice a woman standing off to the left of the man, clearly waiting for Tony.

“Peter!” He would say. “How the hell are you?”

To which Peter would reply: “I’m very well.”

“What brings you out here?”

“School. NYU.”

Then he would follow Peter’s gaze to the woman. A brief acknowledgement of the situation would flash through his eyes before deciding there would be no harm and introducing the pair. 

“Peter, this is my wife.”

They would shake hands, and Peter would offer a polite smile. The wife would have heard about the boy either explained as a friendship or a complete confession of the affair. Either way, she would be too polite to make Peter uncomfortable.

There would be an offer of having coffee at some point in the future which neither would solidify plans for. Then, Tony would wish him a good semester to which the wife would echo, then she would take his arm and pull him down the sidewalk. Tony would glance over his shoulder with much the same expression as the day he had driven away. 

This was not the way it happened. 

Tony was giving a seminar on modern business which Peter was attending for extra credit for his economics class. He didn’t need the extra credit, but he attended anyway because he couldn’t pass up the opportunity of observing the man without being observed himself for two hours. During the seminar, he had debated whether he would be sticking around for the reception afterwards. No doubt, kids would be coming left and right to get the mogul’s advice and presenting their ideas for feedback.

What was the harm? 

He hung around the edges of the room being sure to steer clear of the throng that had developed. He had thought his cover was blown a few times when there would be hole in the crowd allowing a view of Peter. He would quickly shuffle away and soon the hole would be filled again.

After an hour, the crowd had begun to thin out. He would be lying if he said that he didn’t know where the other man was always. But the official narrative would go like this:

Peter made his way to the exit which he conveniently had to walk past the throng to get to. Without meaning to, he passed directly in front of the line of sight of the nucleus of the group. He kept his head down till he got to the entryway. Just before he could touch the door, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He spun around pretending to be surprised when he saw Tony.

“H-hey Mr. Stark.” He smiled awkwardly.

“What? Were you gonna leave without saying hi to me? I saw you playing wallflower earlier. You’re not exactly a daffodil if I recall.”

Peter blushed, trying to ignore the blatant sexual reference. “I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t know where to begin.”

“Hello would be good.”

“Hello.”

Tony stared at the boy for a moment. “So, you attend NYU.”

“Yes, I do-”

“Tony! Some kids are wanting you to autograph your book.”

A tall strawberry blonde woman was making her way over to the pair. He black dress accentuated the length of her frame. It also accentuated her protruding belly.

“Hello,” she said to Peter.

“Peter, this is Pepper.”

“Nice to meet you,” he shook her hand.

“It’s very nice to meet you as well,” Before turning to Tony, “We can only be here for another hour because we have meetings in the morning.”

Tony nodded and told her would be quick. They watched as she walked away, and Tony turned to look at Peter, apprehension clear on his face.

“I didn’t know you were married.”

Scripted.

Tony Stark had never been on Peter Parker’s radar before Labor Day. Now that he was paying attention, the man’s name was all over the news. He thought the hardest part was seeing the man’s photo. The interviews were worse. But, the worst one, the absolute worst was the wedding announcement in the newspaper. Somehow, he had missed the engagement announcement. But there they were, Mr. and Mrs. Stark.

This was when he stopped googling Tony Stark.

There were the occasional slips in the middle of the night when things didn’t count as much. He would open google images and pull up the Vanity Fair photoshoot from Tony’s playboy days. Tan skin, dark hair, rippling muscles. The youth of the Tony Stark of ten years ago had Peter coming with a hand over his mouth, orgasm taking over his body memorized from those blissful nights. Guilt washed over him afterwards, though. Tony Stark was a married man. It was forbidden. Peter would not stoop to that level.

But the man was standing right in front of him, and he was thinking about his last orgasm.

“Six months.”

He couldn’t stop himself from saying it. He had to know. “So, this developed after La Mer.”

“If you’re asking if I was single when we… that would be correct.”

The man couldn’t even say what they had done.

It wasn’t as if Tony was cheating. He had been single, a free bird. Then, he entered a relationship and got married not even six months later. That’s where he was on Tony Stark’s list.

“Well, congratulations. I must get going. I have… homework.”

“Peter!” He heard, but it was mixed with Pepper calling, “Tony!”

“Goodbye, Mr. Stark.”

Peter very much wished their story had ended neatly with Tony driving away. This was so much worse.

⸎

And just like that, Peter had come into his life again. That was the breaking point.


	2. Resistant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony pines after Peter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I absolutely adore this chapter.

It had been a month since the seminar. Peter had thrown himself into his studies while Ned could only sympathize with this downward spiral. Peter had never come right out and admitted what he and Tony had shared, but it seemed it was obvious to everyone else. His friends seemed to accept without asking any questions sensing that it was private. Or maybe they sensed that Peter didn’t have the answers either. 

Peter had met a man around Tony’s age who taught in another department. The professor would take Peter to dinner a few times a week and have coffee between classes. The professor looked a lot like Tony, but he was less harsh around the edges. Softer. 

They had begun having sex just after their second dinner. The professor had suggested they go back to his which Peter accepted. The apartment was in a nice area of New York and had a view of the park. He had felt instantly at home again, in Maine. Although, these thoughts had inevitably brought him back to La Mer. Tony.

The professor was a good distraction though. Peter got the sense that this wasn’t the first time he had “groomed” a student. It seemed well-rehearsed. He kept asking if Peter was uncomfortable and saying they could stop. Peter only had to say the word.

No. He didn’t want to stop. He wanted his hurt erased. He wanted Tony’s face replaced with the professor’s. He kept his eyes open during everything so that his retinas would be burned with new memories and anything that wasn’t Tony. 

Although it was a rebound, Peter was happy to drag it out for as long as possible. The professor didn’t seem tired of him yet. In fact, he asked to meet up more and more frequently to the point that Peter was bent over his desk during office hours. 

The professor was a good lover he had decided. He wasn’t married. He had divorced twenty years ago, and his children were around Peter’s age. But at least he wasn’t married and didn’t intend to remarry anytime soon. There were no women hiding in the closet. He didn’t even have a closet.

One day, the professor was watching his face postcoital. He was an analyzer. He couldn’t help it; he was a literature professor with a master’s in psychology. Peter had been resting on his belly sprawled out across the bed while the professor lay on his side tracing his face. 

He was almost asleep from the delicate caresses.

“He must’ve done a real number on you.”

Peter hummed in acknowledgement.

It was after a late night and two bottles of wine that the professor dropped Peter off at his apartment. He had pulled Peter in for a long kiss while caressing his genitals before finally letting the boy go. He waved after a tired walk up the stairs then let himself into the building.

He stopped mid step when he saw a figure sitting on the stairs leading up to his floor. From the man’s expression, Peter could tell that Tony had seen everything through the window in the stairwell. If only he had been a few floors higher. There was an accusatory look like he had just caught his wife cheating. Peter wasn’t cheating. He had every right to this relationship, to happiness without Tony.

He opted to try and move past Tony.

The man held out an arm to block his path. Peter could’ve easily pushed past the arm, but he didn’t. He didn’t want there to be any physical contact. If there was physical contact, who knows what Peter would do? He ached to have Tony’s arms around him and have his seed spilling out of him.

He sat down next to the railing as far from Tony as he could get.

“You know I could end his career like that,” Tony snapped his fingers.

Peter rolled his eyes at this statement. “Just leave us be. We’re happy.”

“Happy? He looked like a pedophile groping his nephew after ice cream.”

Peter cringed at the wording. “I wonder how we looked then.”

Tony snorted. “Not like that.”

“So, why are you here?” Peter asked gently, trying to move away from conversation about his current lover. The last person he wanted to discuss things with was Tony.

“Hm?” Tony asked distractedly. “Oh, I came by to see if you wanted to have dinner. Ned said you were out.”

Great, so he would have to explain what Tony Stark was doing here looking for him. Annoyance coursed through him. “How long have you been here?”

“A few hours,” the man admitted.

“Tony…” Peter protested. “What are you doing here?”

“I told you. To take you to dinner.”

“And I’m flattered. I really am, but you’re with Pepper now.”

“I stay friends with all of my lovers.”

“Yeah, I get that, but no offense, it’s kinda hard to be around you right now.”

Tony looked like he hadn’t even considered that possibility. “Just let me take you out to dinner.”

Even though he had already eaten, Peter agreed. If Tony hadn’t insisted, he could be in his warm bed by now. But it was always the insistence. Ask him once, and he’ll say no. Ask him twice, and he’s yours.

He nodded.

Tony stood up, wincing, as he had been sitting on the hard floor for hours. He offered a hand to Peter who tried to ignore the electricity at the contact and let the elder pull him to his feet. He wanted to cry. He wanted to beg the man. _Please, touch me. Anywhere. Everywhere. I don’t care. Please, take me on this staircase right now._

“Come on,” Tony called halfway down the stairs, “Don’t change your mind on me now, Parker.”

Peter had been expecting the white Audi, but a black sedan pulled up to the curb. A man in his 40s was driving and didn’t seem too happy which makes what Tony said next ironic.

“That’s Happy.”

“Hi, Happy. I’m Peter.”

“He’s my driver.”

“I’m head of security actually.”

Happy put up the partition then either out of respect for his boss or annoyance towards Peter, he couldn’t tell.

They sat across from each other, Peter somewhat indignantly, with his arms crossed leaning away from the table. He had only ordered water while Tony had ordered scotch. The man now swished chunks of ice in his mouth melting them somewhat before biting down. He did this several times until the glass was empty and the server brought him another. He regarded Peter while doing so. They must’ve looked like an interesting pair. Odd. Like angry lovers trying to have a civil dinner though they had fought over everything on the car ride over.

Peter ordered dessert while Tony ordered dinner, then Tony took it upon himself to attempt conversation.

“You could’ve told me you had already eaten.”

Peter shrugged, “But you’re hungry.”

Tony sighed heavily. “Kid…”

Peter jumped slightly at the old nickname. He wondered if Tony thought they could forget the past year and the fact the other was married with a child on the way. That was it, wasn’t it? Why else would the man wait for hours on his staircase and stick around even after his lover dropped him off?

“No.”

“You haven’t even heard what I have to say.”

“I don’t need to. You may stoop to that level, but I won’t.”

“But I need you.”

“And I needed you.”

The server brought out the food now cutting the tension with steaming pasta and a chilled tiramisu. 

They thanked the server politely and waited for privacy.

“I’m sorry,” Tony said sincerely, hands braced on the table leaning towards Peter. His gaze dropped to the younger’s lips.

“So am I.”

They ate in silence. Peter finished sooner and observed the elder. There were lines in his face that seemed deeper than before. He had stressed over this.

“All I’m saying is you wouldn’t need to worry about a thing. Everyone has lovers. I’d take care of you, get you out of that horrid apartment-”

“I like my apartment.”

Tony looked at him skeptically. “I’d pay your tuition.”

“I have scholarships.”

“Let me take care of you.

“No.”

The conversation was stilted after that with Tony inquiring about Peter’s classes and day-to-day life. He begrudgingly gave the information to the elder man while skirting around anything to do with the professor.

The car ride was quiet. This time, Happy left the partition down. Peter wondered if the driver had guessed the nature of the pair’s relationship and was taking it as his moral duty to his boss’s marriage to keep an eye out. They stopped outside the apartment building.

“Let me know if you change your mind.”

And he almost did. The man was sitting before him, begging for him to be his lover. Saying he would pay his tuition, get him out of his crappy apartment, give him a good life. The most important thing was he would have a piece of the man even if he couldn’t have all of him.

What stopped him was Ben’s face, his father’s face, his mother’s face. He couldn’t do that when they were looking down at him from heaven. He had to make them proud.

“I won’t”

“Here,” Tony said, trying to slip him a piece of paper. “It’s my phone number. In case you need anything.”

“I don’t want it, Tony.”

“Just, please. It would give me peace of mind.”

“I’m really trying to do the right thing here. For you, for your wife, for your unborn child. Why won’t you just let me?! Are you really that selfish?” Peter searched the older man’s eyes for answers. He guessed the man didn’t have them either.

“Goodbye, Mr. Stark.” He exited the car.

“Peter!” Tony’s voice was high and panicked.

He felt the hand on his arm, heat seeping into his veins.

“Yeah?” He replied shakily.

“Be careful. With Banner, I mean.” Peter began to protest. “You don’t know him like I do.”

“Yeah, okay.” Peter shook him off and continued walking.

“I’m being serious!” He called.

“I’m sure you are.” He realized how dickish that sounded and turned to flash a reassuring smile. “Thanks, Tony. I know your heart’s in the right place.”

“Text me,” Tony insisted holding out the paper.

Peter took the paper not wanting to cause any more of a scene than they already had in front of Happy who was now eyeing Peter curiously. Maybe he had earned the man’s respect after all.

When Peter crawled into bed that night, he put an hour loop of Billie Eilish’s Everything I Wanted.

⸎

‘I know your heart’s in the right place.’

The words echoed around Tony’s head. In truth, he was the scum of the earth. His pregnant wife was at home in bed and had eaten dinner alone while he was out at his ex-lover’s apartment waiting for his return. His lover had a lover, and Tony didn’t care that Peter probably had his lover’s cum in his ass still. He just wanted a piece.

On the hyper-mature to selfish side of things, Tony was on the cusp of 50. If he didn’t have kids now, he wouldn’t see them graduate high school. Forget about college, weddings, and grandchildren. So, he pulled his eggs into one basket in the form of Pepper Potts. She was the endgame.

He knew he was not in the right state of mind.

Although, affairs often did occur during pregnancy. As sad as it was, he was not the only man in the world cheating on his pregnant wife with a young man. But it wasn’t even cheating as Peter had rejected him. Oh, he would wear him down though. Peter Parker would be his.

“Tony…” Pepper mumbled turning over. “Where have you been?”

He tried his hardest to not jostle the bed. What was the point in having the most expensive mattress technology in the world if simply crawling into bed after a late one, would wake your pregnant wife? The one person whose nagging you seriously could do without at the moment. It was too soon to pour salt in the wounds of rejection.

‘Dammit’ he mouthed, head dropping in exasperation.

“Hi, baby,” he whispered pulling her close. “Had a late meeting.”

“I didn’t see anything on your schedule,” she murmured.

Curse that shared fucking schedule.

“Something came up.”

“Okay,” she turned back over. “Don’t forget the appointment tomorrow.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it, darling.” He kissed her hair and caressed her belly.

Tony felt like a cat on hot bricks. The ball was in Peter’s court. His pathetic self had given over all control in the form of a piece of paper with a few digits scrawled onto it, his personal phone number. He wondered if the boy would just toss it, then he would have to change his number again if someone got their hands on it.

The couple went to the appointment the next day. It was an important one, they would find out the gender today. It always made him feel emotional to see his child on the ultrasound. He would get close to the monitor, nose almost touching as he tried to take in every detail. Pepper wouldn’t allow him to design his own tech at home that would allow them to see even more detail. She said the wait was worthwhile. Unlike him, she enjoyed the anticipation of the unknown details about their child.

Tony suffered through each day repeatedly checking his phone, waiting for the moment when Peter would be worn down. He knew the kid would eventually contact him, not being able to resist the fact he had the businessman’s personal number. It was just a matter of when.

A week later, he got his first message from Peter Parker.

Unknown, 0837pm: Hey

Unknown, 0910pm: It’s Peter.

Unknown, 0910pm: Parker

Tony had been down in his workshop, designing the crib so he hadn’t seen the messages when they came through. It was when he was waiting for the coffee machine to warm the water that he checked his phone.

He felt as if his stomach had flipped into his throat. Immediately, he saved the number as into his contacts.

Tony, 0926pm: About time.

Tony, 0926pm: I’m not getting any younger over here.

Peter, 0927pm: Oh hey!

Peter, 0927pm: I thought you were ignoring me for a second

Peter, 0927pm: How are you

Tony chuckled at Peter’s Gen-Z style typing. If it were anybody else, it would grate on his nerves.

Tony, 0929pm: I’m great. How are you?

Tony, 0929pm: We found out the gender by the way.

Peter’s replies came through quickly which made Tony’s heart warm. Maybe they were okay after all.

Peter, 0929pm: I’m good! Just classes. Lots of homework

Peter, 0930pm: That’s awesome! Is it a boy or a girl???

Peter, 0935pm: Can’t take the suspense ☹

Tony had taken his coffee upstairs and settled onto the sofa to get comfortable. His productivity had dwindled after the first messages.

Tony, 0936pm: Still here, just getting comfortable.

Tony, 0936pm: It’s a girl, by the way.

Peter, 0937pm: Congratulations!

Several fireworks erupted across the screen of his phone. What just happened? Was this a hacking? Oh, wait, he remembered when they had first announced the news and people would send those through message.

They chatted the rest of the evening about the baby and school. Tony even asked how May was doing, she was fine. It was a little after midnight when they finally said goodnight. In the morning, there was a message from Peter.

Peter, 0703am: Good morning :) I really enjoyed talking with you last night. But I want you to know this doesn’t change anything. We’re just friends.

Tony, 0746am: I know, kid. Have a good day x

He couldn’t resist putting the kiss on the end of the message. It sounded hurt and snarky without it. Which he wasn’t or at least that’s what he was telling himself.

When he and Rhodey went for their run that morning, his friend couldn’t resist commenting on his sudden change in mood.

“I’m real glad you got past that roadblock. You look good, Tony.” Rhodey had slapped his arm before departing. “See you.” Tony didn’t have the heart to tell him that the sudden change was accredited to a certain 18-year-old currently sitting in class across town.

His phone vibrated in the elevator.

Peter, 0849am: Thanks x

Peter, 0849am: You, too

Peter, 0850am: Mr. Stark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)  
> I will be uploading twice a week.


	3. Stimulus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ;)

Peter pocketed his phone noting that he had a missed call and a few texts from May. He shouldn’t have put that x on the end of his message. It was only encouraging bad behavior. But it was harmless and in the moment. It would’ve looked stilted or even sarcastic without it. Also, it would have pointed a finger to the x from Tony being problematic which it wasn’t. They were just friends.

He knew he must’ve been insufferable to be around now. Everything seemed to be glowing now that he wasn’t trying so hard not send a text to Tony Stark. Just the week before, he had been in the foulest of moods, sulking. They were in the library When MJ held up her sketchbook at him. There he was looking dreamily out the window, chin in hand. At the bottom, she had written, ‘I prefer drawing people in crisis.’ The word ‘crisis’ was underlined several times.

Peter shrugged and raised his eyebrows as if to say, ‘Sorry, what can you do?’

She eyed him suspiciously then turned her page over to start a new sketch, most likely of Ned who was freaking out over cramming for finals and finishing all of his end of semester projects.

⸎

"Janie?” Pepper called from the bed, flipping through the baby names book.

Tony finished swishing the mouthwash around his mouth and spat. “Mmm. I think that’s too common. Too girly.”

“Well, she is a girl,” Pepper pointed out.

Tony chuckled, “I thought you were a feminist.”

She sighed in exasperation then absentmindedly rubbed her belly. “I suppose we could go with something neutral.”

Tony settled into the bed next to his wife, wrapping an arm around. “Let me see that thing.”

Pepper handed the book over along with his reading glasses that were on the side table.

“Thanks,” he whispered and kissed her temple.

Conflicted. That was the word he would use to describe this situation. But if he called it a situation that would be acknowledging that it was in fact a situation. How was he supposed to know that Peter would choose NYU when he had the pick of the country? Maybe it was the obvious decision. His friends attended NYU. It was close enough to May where he could still catch a bus home.

Ironically, it had been Pepper who had scheduled the seminar. But how could she have known that the seminar would be the catalyst? Peter, a free agent, had chosen to attend the seminar and hang around afterwards as well. Tony was really just stuck in the middle of two reagents in this chemical equation that had become his existence.

What was interesting though, was that it was not exhausting. He was comfortable if he even dared to think it. He had a child on the way and an old friend back in his life, using the term ‘old friend’ loosely here.

After some discussion, Pepper turned in for the night. It was still early to Tony, so he flipped through the book on his own. Curious, he flipped to the boy’s names.

Peter: Stone or rock.

“Interesting,” Tony said to himself raising his eyebrows.

Tony: Priceless one.

“Alright, now I feel attacked,” he murmured.

His phone buzzed.

Peter, 0945pm: Bruce keeps asking who I’m texting

Tony’s heartbeat automatically sped up when he saw that it was Peter and even more once he read the message. In his head, he could see the situation: Banner laying with Peter, postcoital, with a glass of wine. Peter’s phone goes off, and the kid smiles to himself seeing who it is which alerts Banner. Not good.

Tony, 0946pm: Lie. He’s the jealous type.

Peter, 0946pm: I did.

Peter, 0947pm: But I feel bad

How did Tony broach the subject that Banner was most likely using Peter for sex? He didn’t want to hurt Peter’s feelings, but the kid needed a reality check. Peter didn’t need to worry about Banner’s feelings especially when the pair weren’t even in a steady relationship. Even if they were, who did Banner think he was questioning the kid about who he was texting? The man didn’t own him.

Tony, 0954pm: Why x

Tony, 0954pm: We’re not doing anything wrong

Peter, 1001pm: If we’re not doing anything wrong, why lie

Peter, 1001pm: x

Was the kid teasing him or mocking him? Hadn’t the kid already lied to Banner before texting him? And if that was the case, he was sure it was, then why mention it Tony? What purpose did it serve telling him this?

He was testing the waters. Or maybe he didn’t have anyone else to discuss this with as it was a professor. He secretly felt smug that he was getting this information, that Peter valued his opinion enough, that he felt safe enough to share private details of his relationship.

Tony knew how Banner could be, though. That was going to bother him, knowing that Peter had a ticking time bomb in his pocket in the form of a cellphone with his ex-lover’s messages on it.

Tony, 1004pm: Trust me.

⸎

Across town, Peter felt chills go down his spine.

‘Trust me,’ the message had read. No x, no flirtation, no lightening the very clear message. Tony was worried for Peter’s safety it seemed. The words from the night they went to dinner floated through his head, ‘Be careful. You don’t know him like I do.’ And the panicked expression. It was impossible to tell if he was panicked at the idea of losing Peter to someone else or if there was some sincerity behind the expression.

Tonight, he seemed sincere even over text. It felt better to think that way. Peter didn’t want to believe that Tony was intentionally trying to hurt his relationship. Bruce had never done anything to make Peter feel uncomfortable. He wouldn’t hurt a fly.

Peter, 1019pm: He won’t hurt me

Tony, 1020pm: Yeah.

Tony, 1020pm: Not like I did x

What the fuck?

Peter, 1021pm: ?

He waited for the reply to come, but it seemed Tony was intent on ignoring him. He needed to know what the other man meant. He felt the need to apologize. He didn’t mean it in a competitive way. Why was Tony even going there in the first place? It was one thing to think it but another to tell Peter that. He wondered if the man’s feelings were deeper than he originally thought. It was beginning to become apparent that the man didn’t just want to fulfill his desire for, well, men.

Peter, 1025pm: I wasn’t trying to be rude.

Peter, 1033pm: Tony?

Sleep didn’t come easy that night. Peter tossed and turned. When he did manage to get some sleep, he dreamt that he was having sex with Bruce. The face would fade to Tony’s who would whisper ‘Trust me’ in his ear and ‘You don’t know him like I do.’

He woke up before his alarm and checked his messages.

Tony, 0321am: I’m sorry. I know you’re not trying to throw that in my face.

Was Tony really acknowledging his marrying Pepper had hurt Peter? Tony seemed more hurt by what he himself had done than Peter was.

Peter, 0703am: Don’t beat yourself up over it

Peter, 0704am: I’ll be okay.

It was a couple of days before Tony messaged Peter again. It started off slightly formal but turned back to their usual comfortable chatting.

Peter threw himself into studying for his finals and projects. MJ was still suspicious over his sudden uplift in mood, eyeing him whenever he would pounce on his phone eager to see who it was. They were trucking along when Peter received a message.

Tony, 1236pm: Wanna come over?

What? Peter’s heart skipped several beats. Go over to Tony Stark’s _house_. Maybe he had texted the wrong number.

Peter, 1237pm: Do you really think that’s a good idea?

Oh, God. What was he doing? Don’t say no!

Tony, 1238pm: Why wouldn’t it be?

Tony, 1238pm: We’re just friends.

He was throwing Peter’s words back in his face. What he should do is ignore the man for hours like he had done to Peter when he _thought_ Peter had done the same thing. But no. He didn’t have that kind of self-control.

He didn’t know what he had expected. The tall building? Yes. The private elevator? Yes. Tony’s extremely nice penthouse covered in pink flowers and baby paraphernalia? No.

The door swung open revealing the trappings of a baby shower. “Hey,” Peter said. He didn’t know why, but he leaned forward for a hug made awkward by the other’s stiff body. Did Tony just smell him?

Tony’s eyes were somewhat hazy when they pulled apart.

“Let’s try not touching.”

“Oh!” Peter’s eyes went wide. “Sorry.”

Tony turned and walked away. Peter assumed that was as good a welcome as he would get. Had he not been invited over? He wanted to read back over his messages to be sure he hadn’t misinterpreted something.

He was led past the living room into the kitchen area. Tony immediately went for a drink. He seemed to do that a lot around Peter. They shot the breeze for a little while, baby stuff, work, school. Tony was showing him some of the ultrasound photos he had saved on his phone. It was the happiest Peter had seen Tony all evening, his eyes lit up talking about his daughter taking years off his face. Peter hadn’t even realized he had done it.

Tony eyed the hand that was on his shoulder, “Dangerous territory, Parker.”

Peter realized what he had done and dropped his hand. There was a tense stillness in the room. If someone walked in right now, they would immediately become aware of the sexual tension.

“We had the baby shower earlier,” Tony said to break the silence.

“Yeah, I can see that.” He looked around at the apartment. “I wish you had told me. I would’ve brought a gift.”

“You don’t have to pretend you’re interested in the baby.”

Peter gave the elder a strange look. “I’m not pretending. It’s important to you, so it’s important to me…” He mumbled the last part feeling shy.

Tony was looking at him tenderly.

Peter realized he was giving himself away. He looked around again. “Where is Pepper?”

“She’s asleep.”

“Oh,” Peter sat up straighter, suddenly feeling watched. He didn’t know where he thought she was, out maybe.

“Relax, all the cameras are off.”

“Cameras?” Peter looked at the ceiling then eyed the flower arrangement on the coffee table. Who had cameras in their house? He had turned them off because Peter was coming over. Red flag. Abort, abort, ab-

Tony raised his eyebrows then shrugged. “Wanna watch a movie?”

They were sitting in a less formal TV room, small fireplace glowing. It seemed innocent enough on opposite ends of the sofa. Peter sat stiffly; hands folded in his lap. Tony was only slightly more relaxed, legs crossed, and arm thrown over the back of the sofa. He scrolled through the movie options and glanced at Peter every so often, eyebrows raised to say: this one? How about this one?

“You pick,” Peter said. _I won’t be watching it anyway._

The movie began to play in the background. After a while, Peter didn’t have to pretend he wasn’t interested anymore as the plot picked up. He relaxed into the cushions and pulled his legs to his chest.

“Cold?”

Peter rested his head on the back of the sofa and nodded. A blanket was laid out over him. “Tired?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” Peter murmured.

‘You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming?’ From that point on, it was hard to decern where his dream ended, and reality began. One moment, he was back at La Mer reading Peter Pan. The next, he was on an unfamiliar sofa in an unfamiliar room with a very familiar man.

Peter dozed on the sofa, the heat of the fire on his body lulling him into slumber. The empty cushion at his feet dipped as someone adjusted his feet so they were resting on a lap. He didn’t need to open his eyes to know it was Tony. A hand brushed his foot, and Peter sighed. The hand stopped as if contemplating then stroked it once more, testing. Peter pressed his face into the pillow scrunching his nose. The hand began a torturous massage. Peter moaned softly.

His heart stopped. He didn’t want to encourage this married man to provide him sexual pleasure. It was so wrong. But his hard dick felt so right. 

His eyes fluttered open to meet Tony’s sultry gaze. 

Slowly, Tony pressed into the arch of Peter’s foot. He didn’t know how something simple could be so sexual. 

“Touch yourself.”

“I can’t.”

“We’re not doing anything wrong.”

“You’re married.”

“Peter.”

The firelight threw shadows that danced across the older man’s face. The darkness played with the light in Peter’s heart. It wasn’t bad. So, what if he so happened to find pleasure from the hand working Tony’s foot. The other man wasn’t guilty, just giving a massage. Peter would take all the blame in this.

He slowly pulled up his shirt.

“That’s it,” Tony purred.

He unbuttoned his pants slowly and pulled his cock out. It pulsed in his hand while drops of precum soiled his jeans. 

Tony grazed his arch again before pressing deeper.

Peter moaned loudly and began stroking himself. “F-fuck.”

“Come on, baby. Faster,” Tony murmured.

He obeyed.

“T-Tony… it’s been so long. I fucking love y- ”

Tony’s fingers working his foot took the words from his mouth. He wanted to drag this out forever. This feeling of warmth and love and light smothered the months of cold loneliness. Tears pricked his eyes at the pleasure. The emotion from it all should have embarrassed him, but Tony’s expression mirrored his own, so he knew he was in safe company.

Tony groaned lowly.

This almost sent Peter over the edge. But he couldn’t let this moment end so soon.

“Don’t want to come,” he gasped out.

“Why baby?”

“Don’t want it to end,” the tears made themselves known as he knew he couldn’t hold off any longer. 

His orgasm exploded into his chest. He arched his back, and his jaw went slack as his mouth opened into a soundless moan. The man’s name on his lips whispered so reverently like a prayer. 

When it was over, he covered his face in shame, quickly pulling tissues from the side table to wipe up his mess.

“Peter…” Tony called.

Tears were falling in a steady stream.

He laid on his side on the couch, arms wrapped around himself. 

He sobbed quietly pressing his face into the pillow once more. 

He tried to push away Tony’s arms, but the older man wouldn’t have it. 

“I fucking want you so bad,” Peter choked out.

Tony responded by pulling him tighter against him. Peter could feel the remains of an erection pressing against his bottom probably flaccid from the crying. It just wasn’t fair. 

It wasn’t fair that his lover had gone off and married a woman who was filled with the man’s semen until the point of impregnation. It wasn’t fair he had to see her swollen body waddling arm in arm with his lover. It wasn’t fair for his lover to do this.

“Why did you do this to me?” He whimpered.

The response was even more unfair.

“I don’t know.”

When Peter had pulled himself together sufficiently, he got up, and Tony followed him to the door. “I didn’t want to do this. This is exactly what I didn’t want. I didn’t want to be that person.”

Tony stared at the floor, hands in pockets.

Peter shook head and left.

When he got home, he saw he had a message.

Tony, 1127pm: Don’t hate me

Peter, 1153pm: I hate myself

Incoming call, Tony.

⸎

It was hard to pinpoint the exact moment Tony Stark lost control. Something about the baby shower had sent him over the edge.

Up until then, he had full control over the situation. The situation, to call it a situation is acknowledging that it is in fact a situation. There is no situation because they’re not doing anything wrong. He stays friends with all his lovers. He knows this, Pepper knows this, and the world knows this. But Pepper and the world don’t know about _him_. Because he couldn’t be a gay man with a 17-year-old on his arm.

He wanted to strangle Steve, he wanted to call Steve. _Why did you do this to me?_ Steve was the closest he had come to being just Tony.

_Take away all that stuff, and what are you?_

_Confused, lonely, scared. Steve,_ help _me._

_The only person who can help you is yourself, and I’m not going to wait around for you to find that out._

_He’s my friend._

_So was I._

Someone stepped on a balloon.

“Tony, you better get your sleep now because when that pretty baby comes, you won’t be getting much.”

Laughter erupted around them. He lifted his glass in a toast. “Here’s to never sleeping again.” 

He was rewarded with several chuckles from the men. It was a co-ed baby shower. With each bag opened, he felt Peter slipping further and further from his fingers like grains of sand at the beach. La Mer.

During everything, he found himself in his workshop, staring at the photo he kept hidden away in his desk. It had been months since he had looked at it. He hadn’t needed to since Peter had walked back into his life. He had the real thing which he hadn’t seen since that night at dinner.

Tony, 1236pm: Wanna come over?

Then, everything had happened, and he couldn’t breathe because Peter had run from him. He couldn’t get away from the older man fast enough.

“I didn’t want to do this. This is exactly what I didn’t want. I didn’t want to be that person.”

The words ran around between his ears pushing their feet into every little cell in his brain. He had a migraine. The only thing he could think was messaging Peter. He knew the kid needed his space in the moment, but Tony couldn’t let this happen.

How could the kid hate himself? He was so beautiful, perfect, Peter. And Tony was this confused old man who was the scum of the earth who deserved to be kicked in the teeth for what he was doing to Pepper, to Peter.

He called, terrified the other man wouldn’t answer.

“Hello?”

Oh, thank every god.

“Peter, please,” he choked out. “Please just hate me. I deserve it. I am a terrible human being who doesn’t deserve you.”

“Tony… I don’t. I just need some time.”

“I know I crossed a line tonight, and you made it clear. Please, don’t do this. I’ll never touch you again if you don’t want me to.”

The kid made a whimpering noise. Tony liked to imagine it was because Peter couldn’t stand the idea of Tony not touching him ever again.

“I just want to be able to live with myself, and I don’t particularly like the person I’m becoming. I can’t live with him.”

There was silence.

“I need some time,” he repeated.

“Just don’t forget about me, please.”

Peter barked out a laugh. “Don’t make me laugh. I’ll see you around, Tony.”

The call ended.

“Fuck!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	4. Unmanageable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Annual Stark Christmas Party... What could go wrong (or right)?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I adore this chapter.

It had been three weeks since the incident in Tony’s living room. There had been no contact between the pair. Peter was actively trying to move past it. However, he seemed to be spending less evenings with the professor and more with the memory of a fire lit room. Maybe Tony had decided to settle down and play the part of the loving, doting husband to his pregnant wife. This did not bother Peter. In fact, he was happy for the man.

The invitation to the Stark Holiday Party arrived in the mail. The invitation was on the expensive elegant kind of paper, so he rightly assumed that the guest list would be numerous. There was not even an RSVP number anywhere on the card because no one in their right minds would turn down an invitation from the Starks. 

This was tempting to Peter. Go and show off the professor on his arm while playing the immature brat to make Tony jealous. In all honesty, Peter was hurt by the fact Tony had left him in the dust. It was unfair because Peter had all along been the chivalrous ex-lover who wouldn’t participate in Tony’s adultery. Now that he had finally succumbed to the beast, he wanted more yet the beast was respecting his space.

There Peter was in front of his mirror, adjusting his tie. _The_ tie. _His_ tie. He tightened until it was pressing into his neck not quite uncomfortable but restricting none the less. 

The professor picked Peter up in his black BMW, and they began the slow crawl through traffic. In the distance, they could see glimpses of the Stark tower between the buildings. It grew bigger and bigger along with Peter’s nerves. The party was held on the first floor of the tower where there was plenty of room for guests in its grand lobby. There were press lining the stairs leading up to the entrance. The pair passed easily by being of no interest to the tabloids. 

_If only they knew._ Peter thought as he took the professor’s arm before entering. 

The room was crowded but not to the point of being uncomfortable. There were pockets of people here and there. A steady hum of chatter echoed around the large room backed by soft piano music. Occasionally, a laugh would come from the distance. True to its intention, the lobby was tastefully decorated in golds and silvers. Rich people colors. As they passed between groups, someone would eye the two before letting their gaze move on when deciding the pair couldn’t be anyone important. 

The laughter increased in volume as they approached a throng of people which Peter assumed could only hold Tony as its nucleus. There he was. Tony must’ve sensed Peter’s gaze because he turned around at just the right moment for their eyes to meet. A slow, lazy smile took over the billionaire’s face. Of course, a pregnant Pepper next to him followed her husband’s lead and soon the whole group turned to look at what was so interesting to Tony Stark. 

“I must say hello to an old friend,” he announced with an over pretentious air, clearly having already had his share of eggnog. He made a joke then bowed for the group practically dancing away. The group dissipated, but their eyes stayed. Peter could feel a flush travelling up his neck to his cheeks as he received Tony’s attention in front of a room of people and his lover. 

“Dr. Banner, long time no see.” He extended his hand which the professor took. “The last time I saw you there were a few less letters behind your name.”

“Tony,” Banner said in a friendly tone. “How are you?”

“Swell,” he answered before finally turning to Peter. “Mr. Parker, I’m glad to see you made it.”

Tony offered Peter his hand which to everyone else appeared to be a handshake, but Tony stroked the palm of his hand lightly with his pinky and held it just slightly longer than called for. The finger instantly brought back the glowy memory of a foot massage which translated to his dick hardening. 

“Thank you for inviting me,” he managed to say. If he had blinked, he would’ve missed Tony’s wink.

“Nice tie. I see you don’t have a drink in your hand. We must fix this immediately,” Tony said as the waiter appeared. “Uh-oh no alcohol for the kid. Yes, the virgin eggnog, please. This isn’t the Banner bar.”

Peter never wanted to slip under a table so badly in his life. It was bad enough he already looked young on his lover’s arm, but now everyone knew he was under 21, practically a baby. However, there was jealousy laced into those words allowing the immature side of Peter Parker to find this whole encounter well worth his time. 

“Now, I remember when we were in college. We’re old college buddies by the way,” he said for Peter’s benefit. “So, we would go down-”

Before Tony could continue his story, a voice interrupted, “Don’t start that again.”

A blonde man in his thirties appeared next to Peter. 

Tony visibly stiffened, face draining of color.

“Start what?” A red-haired woman said.

“Tony’s telling stories again.” The blonde man said.

“Oh, please don’t let him have any more eggnog,” she responded before grabbing Peter’s and Tony’s drinks and switching them. “There. That’s better. You were saying?”

“But, don’t take the good stuff, Nat. I need it to remember,” Tony joked.

“Bruce, hi.” The woman named ‘Nat’ said before enveloping him in a hug.

Things were becoming strange. 

The pair began a conversation almost immediately. Peter suspected some history there, but he didn’t mind as Tony was at the forefront of his mind these days. 

This left Peter, Tony, and the blonde man whose name he had yet to learn.

“Aren’t you going to introduce us?” The man teased gesturing to Peter.

Tony’s lips tightened the smallest amount. There just might be some history here as well. 

“This is Steve. Steve, Peter. Peter, Steve.” 

They shook hands and exchanged pleasantries. 

“So, how do you know each other?” Steve asked, a glint in his eye. Peter was sure he already suspected something. 

Luckily, Pepper interrupted before things could become even more awkward. 

“Tony, I need you to say hello to the ambassador of Japan.”

“We’ll talk later,” he said to Peter with a meaningful look. 

When they were out of earshot, Steve turned to Peter. It was just the two of them. “So, you and Tony.”

Peter’s ears turned pink as he fumbled for a response to that. “What about me and Tony.”

He sighed before putting an arm around Peter’s shoulders. “Look, kid. Save yourself the heartbreak, it’s not worth it.”

His heart dropped straight to his stomach. “What are you talking-”

“Talking about?” He scoffed. “Please, I know the whipped puppy look when I see it.”

Peter raised an eyebrow.

“Let’s just say. Been there, done that. He will always choose her over you.” He sighs, “He can barely tie his shoes without her let alone handle a multi-billion-dollar company.”

The words were already sinking into his heart. He tried not to let too much emotion show on his face. Thankfully, the alcohol kicked into his system aiding with a bit of liquid courage. “I’m sure he can handle himself a little better than that, Steve.”

With that, he spun on his heel and intended to walk away, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. 

“What do you want?” He muttered before turning around to be met with none other than Tony Stark himself.

“Woah, same side. Just me.” He put his hands up in defense.

Peter didn’t smile though he just swallowed and looked over Tony’s shoulder following Steve’s retreating figure.

“All right, what did he tell you?”

“Nothing worth repeating. Let’s just leave it at that.”

Peter sought out some water in desperate need of clearing his head. He had been sipping nervously on the alcoholic eggnog until he accidentally drank the whole thing. The beginnings of a headache were coming on.

“You look familiar. Oh, you’re the guy in the photo. Tony’s Peter.”

There was a man to his left that he didn’t recognize who seemed slightly drunk.

“I’m sorry?”

“Colonel Rhodes. Everyone calls my Rhodey.” They shook hands.

Peter wanted to cut to the chase, though. “You were saying something about a photo?”

“Yeah, the one of you two in the Audi. Tony adores that picture.” Rhodey held his hands up to his mouth comically. “I’ve said too much. See you around, Parker.”

Peter tried not to cringe at the fact the man knew his first and last name. How much did he know about everything else?

Over by the windows, Bruce and Nat were laughing together, their heads leaned close together. He couldn’t care less. The object of his attention was acting strangely and was nervous over the blonde man, Steve. Tony was on edge like Peter had never seen before. He was currently dancing with his wife, however, theatrically holding her belly. Bruce and Nat had gone to the dance floor as well. He was one of the only people not dancing.

“Would you like to dance?”

Steve had materialized at his side.

“No, thank you,” he replied curtly. It sounded rude, but this man was no friend of Tony’s which meant he was no friend to Peter.

“Aw, come on. You’re lonely. The man you brought is dancing with another woman, and the man you love is dancing with his wife.”

Peter choked on his drink. Love? Did he just say love?

Steve handed him a napkin, then he leaned closer to his ear. “Come on, let’s make him jealous.”

He knew it was wrong, but the idea sounded so enticing. He shook his head. “No, i-it’s wrong.”

The man put a hand on his elbow then took Peter’s glass. He was having a hard time resisting. Ask him once, he’ll say no. Ask him twice…

Peter let the man lead him onto the dance floor. The man’s grip was strong but not uncomfortable. There was safety in it, sureness. He let out a breath and willed his nerves away. Steve pulled him close to his chest. They began dancing. Honestly, it was one of Peter’s dreams to be pulled onto the dance floor by a strong good-looking man. Oh, God. The way he was looking into his eyes. It wasn’t the fact that Steve was looking into his eyes. It was the fact that someone was looking into his eyes the way he wanted to be looked at.

“There you go,” the other man said as Peter laid his head on his chest in resignation. This was happening.

Steve rested his chin on the top of Peter’s head and breathed slowly in and out. They danced through the song almost to its end as Peter relaxed into the strength of the other man’s arms allowing himself to be so easily led.

“Excuse me.”

They looked up, and Steve smirked, “I knew it was only a matter of time.”

Tony gave the man a chilly look then turned his gaze to Peter, “I need to speak with you.”

“He’s dancing. Why don’t you ask him for a dance?”

“Where’s metal arm, tonight? I noticed you didn’t bring him.”

Steve’s nostrils flared. “He was feeling under the weather.”

“Who invited you, anyway?” Tony threw up his hands in exasperation.

“Pepper.” Steve leaned closer to Tony. “Why don’t you ask him for a dance?”

For a moment, Peter thought there was going to be a showdown between the men. Tony looked almost comical, shoulders stiff and bottom stuck out like an angry ostrich. And Steve with his arms protectively around Peter like a lion with his catch.

Tony turned piercing eyes to him. “Peter,” he held out his hand almost roughly. “Care to dance?”

“Sure.”

Oh, God. It was happening. Tony was going to hold him in his arms and dance.

Peter didn’t grasp at that moment how momentous it was that Tony was dancing with another man in front of everyone he knew. Steve looked surprised then let him go.

Tony’s hand was rough yet sweaty. The man was nervous. He whirled them away from the tall blonde.

“Who’s St-”

“What are you doing?” Tony hissed into his ear.

He was going to ask who Steve was to Tony even though he already knew the answer.

“What are you _playing_ at, Parker?”

Peter didn’t like that tone at all. If the man was going to act this way, he would just give it right back. He rested his arms around the other’s neck, nonchalantly, though on the inside he was dying at their proximity.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just at a party, having a good time.” He stuck his bottom out in a bitchy manner and tilted his head to the side. He knew it was ridiculous, but it was worth it when Tony’s jaw began ticking.

“Yeah, I bet,” the man scoffed then said lowly into his ear. “I’m about two seconds from pulling you into the next room and making you call me daddy. _You’re mine_.”

Jesus Christ. What just happened.

He shivered at the words and his dick twitched in his pants. Oh, no, no, no. But two could play that game.

Although his face was crimson and his knees began to shake, he tilted his chin up so his lips were at Tony’s ear. “Yes… daddy.”

Priceless.

“I swear to Go-”

“Peter.” He didn’t know how to feel about the sudden appearance of Bruce. He did in fact stop something extremely stupid from happening on their part. However, he had stopped something extremely stupid from happening on their part.

“You ready to head home?” Bruce smiled at him, hands in pockets.

“Absolutely,” he replied, returning the friendly expression. He stepped away from Tony who had noticeably cooled down.

“See you, kid. Glad you could make it.”

“Yes,” Peter replied just as coolly. “Thank you for inviting me.”

“It was a pleasure.”

“It was nice seeing you, Tony. Take care,” Bruce called pulling him away.

⸎

He was in a deep sleep when his phone rang. Peter.

“Hello?”

There was a sob on the other end.

“Peter!” He whispered frantically. “What’s going on?”

Pepper stirred next to him. He quickly got out of bed slipping into his house shoes and pulling his robe around him. It had begun to snow earlier that evening during the party. The penthouse was crisp, and a draft lifted from the floor.

Out in the hallway, Tony concentrated on the hyperventilating boy on the phone.

“Peter, you’re going to have to calm down for me. I- I can’t understand you,” Tony simpered using the voice he imagined he would use with his daughter in the years to come.

He didn’t calm down, though. He decided to try a different tactic. “Petey you need to tell daddy what’s going on.” He cringed at the words. _Dirty old man._

“I need you to pick me up.” Surprise and relief went through him, it had worked.

“Where are you, baby?”

“I- I’m outside of Bruce’s apartment. I wouldn’t have called, but the snow is bad. The walk to the station is kinda far. I’m sorry for waking you.”

“Go back inside and wait for me,” Tony instructed.

“I can’t get back into the building. I need to be buzzed in.”

 _Buzzed in. The asshat wouldn’t even buzz the poor kid in._ “Listen. I’m on my way. I’m sending a drone to disable the door. Stay on the phone with me.”

“What? A drone?”

A few moments later, “Holy Shit! That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever seen!”

“Okay, I’m inside.”

“Great, hold the door.”

“What, why?” There was fear in Peter’s voice.

“Cause I’m around the corner, and I’m about to kick somebody’s ass.”

Peter’s voice turned high and panicked. “No, no, no, no! Tony, you’ve got it all wrong.”

“Nobody is going to lay hands on you, honey. Nobody. Not even pretentious Bruce fucking Banner. Now, be a good boy and let daddy take care of business.”

Then the kid did something unexpected, he actually started laughing at Tony.

_He’s just in denial. It’s common with victims of abuse._

He pulled up outside in the SUV, the best thing for the snow, tires screeching at his sudden halt. Peter was already running outside as Tony stepped from the vehicle.

“Peter don’t get in the way,” Tony said marching towards the door of the building.

“Tony! You don’t understand,” the boy protested pushing against the other, but his boots were sliding creating a comical effect. The kid was sliding backwards in the slush while Tony charged forward breathing hard.

“Just let me explain-”

Tony stopped and put a hand to the boy’s cheeks. “You don’t need to explain. You’re a perfect angel. Now, go wait in the car.”

Peter threw his hands up, “I broke up with Bruce!”

The elder man kept walking.

“He kept trying to read my messages, and I told him that I didn’t want to be with anyone who was going to check up on me like that. Well, I kinda freaked out.”

“What?”

“Yeah, I started throwing stuff because he kept saying I was acting out tonight by dancing with Steve and then you. He said I was jealous of him and Natasha. But I wasn’t jealous of them.” The kid huffed. “I was jealous of you.”

Tony sighed feeling reason going through his body. Finally, some honesty.

“You were dancing with Pepper, and I- I know I shouldn’t be jealous. She’s your wife, your very _pregnant_ wife. But I can’t help it. I can’t help what I feel for you. Then Steve said it would make you jealous if we danced. So, feeling the way I did, I obviously couldn’t help myself so-”

“You danced,” Tony finished.

Peter Parker was standing in front of him saying all the things he wanted to hear. It didn’t matter that it was Steve who danced with Peter or that Peter had just been with Banner. The kid was jealous. The same kid who had his tie around his neck. He knew Peter Parker wasn’t moving on any time soon no matter what the kid said, how he acted, what he disagreed with. And that made Tony happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	5. Process

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Breaking down barriers

“You… were ridiculous tonight.”

Tony didn’t say anything just kept drumming his hands on the steering wheel.

“Thanks for picking me up.”

“No problem, kid.”

“Tony?”

Tony’s eyes met Peter’s before looking straight ahead. “Yeah?”

“I don’t want to do this, the staying away from you bit. It’s too hard. Can we be friends? Like really friends? No bullshit, just two dudes hanging out. The thing is, it just gets harder when I’m not around you, and I think that makes you anxious, makes us do things we shouldn’t. Makes us act…”

“Ridiculous?” Tony supplied.

“Well, yeah.”

Tony looked at him longer this time, eyes searching Peter’s.

“Oh, no!” Peter put his hands to the sides of his face. “Bruce was my ride to May’s.”

“Don’t worry about it. Happy will drive you.”

“I’m not so sure he will be up for that…” Peter trailed off remembering the man’s unfriendly gaze the night they had dinner.

“He’ll do it,” Tony said affirmatively. “I’ll text you.”

Then Tony did something amazing, he smiled at Peter. A real smile. One that said everything might just be alright between the pair. Then, then. He reached over and pulled Peter into a hug. Something had broken between the pair, a dam. Peter relaxed, folding himself into the other man’s arms.

“I’ll see you after break,” Peter said, pulling away.

“Yeah, we’ll go do something. Or maybe you can come over and see my lab.”

Peter’s face lit up. “That would be awesome!”

On his way to the door, Tony called, “Oh, Peter?”

He turned around.

“Nice tie.”

He blushed, crimson, and tripped his way to the entrance of the building.

Tony watched Peter till he was inside then drove away. Peter’s chest felt lighter than it had in months. If he didn’t deny his feelings for the man maybe they could just move on.

“Was that Tony Stark?”

Shit. Ned.

MJ was there as well.

Peter sighed. “Yes, yes it was.”

“Told ya,” MJ said holding out her hand. Ned grumbled then pulled out his wallet.

“Are you guys serious right now?” Peter looked wildly between the two. “Wait, you knew this whole time?”

Ned sighed and then said it to him bluntly. “You’re not that great at keeping secrets.”

He rolled his eyes, “I’m going to bed.”

“Peter?” MJ had followed him.

“What’s up?”

“Just… be careful,” she said evenly. He couldn’t get anything past the girl. She saw everything.

“We’re just friends.”

“Right.”

A very grumpy Happy picked him up the next day. Ned had already left on a flight to Hawaii for the holidays, and MJ was staying in the city with relatives. Thank God for Mr. Stark as he would have had to buy a very expensive last-minute bus ticket, or May would’ve had to get him which was difficult considering they would be busy.

He received a text from an unknown number that just read, ‘Here’. Oh, this was going to be a long drive. The man himself was standing at the door by the time he managed to get his suitcase down the stairs.

“Did you get my text?”

No ‘hello’. Nothing.

“Uh, y-yeah. Sorry, I was locking up and-” He gestured to his bag which Happy picked up. “You didn’t have to-” The man was already putting it into the trunk.

He glanced at Peter who was still in the doorway of the building, “Let’s go.”

“Oh!” Peter practically ran to the car. Out of habit, he opened the passenger door.

“What are you doing?” Happy was looking at him like he had three heads.

“Oh, you wanted me to sit in the back.” Peter closed the door.

“Yah.”

They were stuck in traffic on the bridge, and Peter was feeling a little carsick from the stop and go concept. He rolled the window down to let the cool air in.

“What are you doing? You’re letting the smog in the car,” came Happy’s disgruntled voice. “Oh no, you look green. Keep the window down.”

Finally, they made it out of the city and onto the interstate. Peter’s car sickness went away after an hour of constant motion. He leaned his head back and sighed. The open landscape left him feeling slightly exposed and relieved. The skyscrapers of New York were both a blessing and a curse depending on how one looked at it.

Now that he was feeling better, he felt slightly bored. He decided he would make conversation. Maybe if the man got to know him, he would hate him a little less.

“So, how long have you worked for Mr. Stark?”

To his surprise, Happy answered immediately. “Almost thirty years.” He lifted his chin when he said this clearly proud of this fact.

“Wow. That’s a long time,” Peter couldn’t fathom having worked for someone for thirty years when he had barley been alive for half of that time.

If anyone knew anything about Tony Stark, it was the man sitting in the driver’s seat. Which meant he knew about Steve. But they had to warm up to that. They sat in silence for a while. Peter bobbed his head to the music and tried not to hum along. That would probably not go over well.

There were more and more trees the farther North they went. It was feeling less and less like exposure and more like home. He had missed home, his aunt, the B, and even the ocean it was named after. It was also the only place where he and Tony had happy memories. Ever since New York, things hadn’t been so great.

“Are you excited for the baby?” Peter asked conversationally.

“Uh, yeah. I suppose.” There was a tiny flicker of light in the man’s eyes, and Peter knew he was more excited than he was letting on.

“Did you go to the holiday party?”

“Uh, yeah. I’m head of security,” Peter met his eyes in the mirror which had a ‘duh’ expression.

“I met this weird dude. I think his name was… Steve? Yeah.” Peter attempted to make it sound casual, but judging from the man’s expression, he was sucking terribly.

“You danced with him.” Shit. “Now, you’re pretending you don’t know his name. Tony said you were smart. Act like it.”

“I was just wondering-”

“What’s with the 20 questions anyway?” Oh yeah, he’d touched a nerve.

Peter shrugged, batting his eyes innocently. “I was just wondering why Tony is so weird around him.”

“Ask him yourself. I’m gonna put the divider up, do you mind?” He gestured.

Peter shook his head.

“Great. We’ll stop for the bathroom in thirty or so minutes.” With that, the divider went up effectively sealing Peter in silence.

Peter, 1144am: Turns out Happy doesn’t like 20 q’s

Tony, 1201pm: I could’ve told you that.

Peter, 1203pm: Don’t think he likes me much either…

Tony, 1204pm: Do I need to have a talk with him?

Peter, 1204am: No!

Peter, 1205pm: I’m fine

Peter, 1205pm: It’ll just make him hate me more

Tony, 1210pm: Despite how he feels, he needs to remember who he works for. Let me know.

Tony, 1210pm: How are you? How’d you sleep?

Peter looked out the window, thrilled that they were back to normal after everything that had gone down. He smiled at the everchanging landscape rushing by. Tony in boss mode was kind of sexy. But Peter didn’t want to test that for Happy’s sake.

As promised, they stopped for a bathroom break, then continued their journey North.

Peter, 1226pm: Terrible :) You?

Tony, 1233pm: If you slept so terribly, why are you smiling?

Tony, 1234pm: I don’t ever sleep, kid.

Peter, 1235pm: That little escapade last night and… I dreamed about you

Peter, 1241pm: I always dream about you.

They were just two dudes texting, but Peter wanted to say it anyway. If they were more honest with each other, they could acknowledge what had occurred and move forward with life.

Tony didn’t respond which left Peter confused for the remainder of the ride. He tried to tell himself that it didn’t matter that Tony hadn’t answered, that it only matter that Peter had been honest. He _had_ dreamed of Tony last night and _did_ dream about Tony often. They were always at La Mer, soaking in the sun and salty breeze in the air. Occasionally, Peter would have a wet dream. Sometimes, he even dreamed that he was the mystery man Tony had brought, and he watched himself suck Tony off from within the closet.

They were about an hour out when the divider came down. Peter had been dozing in the backseat, sulking more like it. He met Happy’s gaze in the rearview mirror. The man fixed his eyes on the road again, but Peter could feel himself being watched.

“How do you know Tony?”

Peter smiled to himself, the ball was back in his court. “Thought you didn’t like 20 questions.”

Happy scoffed and rolled his eyes. “I don’t. But it’s a serious question, and it would be nice if you could answer without being a brat.”

Peter laughed. For some reason, the man’s annoyance entertained him. “He visited La Mer.”

“La… what?”

“La Mer,” Peter repeated. “It’s a Bed and Breakfast in Maine, my family owns it. That’s where you’re taking me. Well, now it’s just me and my aunt.”

“What happened to the rest of your family?”

“They passed away,” Peter smiled softly trying to lighten that information bomb.

As expected, Happy’s demeanor changed. “Oh. I’m sorry, kid.”

Happy appraised him in the mirror and couldn’t hold Peter’s gaze this time. “S’okay. It’s been a while since…” Everything. The Cessna. The car.

“Doesn’t mean it doesn’t still hurt,” Happy was smiling gently.

They rode in companionable silence. The sky was darkening, but he could see the ocean between the trees clearly as the leaves had all fallen. There was snow on the ground which was a sharp contrast to the way he had left La Mer. They exited off the interstate onto a highway and eventually crossed a bridge. The town was decorated in Christmas decorations and lit up spectacularly sending a wave of pride and homesickness through him.

“Wow,” Happy said pulling up to the B. There were other cars in the driveway which meant they were in fact busy. “Who’s that?”

May was running up to the car, waving excitedly. “Peter!”

He jumped out of the car and met her halfway. “May!”

“Oh, Peter!” She hugged him. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Happy was standing awkwardly with Peter’s bag. “Oh, I’ll take that. Thank you for driving me, Happy. I really appreciate it.”

“No problem,” the man genuinely seemed like it wasn’t a problem.

“Oh, who’s this?” May said stepping away from her nephew.

“Hi, how you doin’?” He held his hand out to May. “I’m Happy. I work for Tony.”

“Tony… Stark?” May gave Peter a confused look who shrugged. “Oh, well. Thank you so much for bringing my nephew to me. You saved us.”

“It’s no problem.”

Peter looked back and forth between the pair. May was giving him eyes and Happy was smiling too hard. Something was up.

“Stay for dinner?” May asked.

“Sure,” Happy responded.

What?

After all the guests were settled in the dining room, the three finally sat down at the kitchen table. Under the kitchen table he sent a frantic message to Tony.

Peter, 0746pm: May asked Happy to stay for dinner

Peter, 0746pm: They’re giving each other eyes!

He saw that he had a message from the man about thirty minutes ago.

Tony, 0710pm: Full disclosure? If I dreamed about you, I wouldn’t lose any sleep.

“No phones at the table, Petey,” his aunt reminded him.

Happy ended up staying the night as it was too late to drive back. May let him use the extra room in their private quarters. Peter was very much suspicious but chose not to think too much into things. It was just gross.

Later that night, Peter lay in bed thinking of a response to Tony’s message. An idea came to him as he perused his old bookshelf. His old copy of Peter Pan was there. He opened it to the page that Tony had marked, ‘Oh the cleverness of me!’ and took a picture.

Tony, 1144pm: Ah, the beginning. Feeling sentimental?

Peter, 1146pm: Yes, Prof Snape

Tony, 1147pm: Was that a Harry Potter reference?

Peter, 1148pm: I love that you know what that is

Tony, 1148pm: Who doesn’t?

Peter spent his break helping May around the B. He helped her fix several things and even repainted some of the rooms. He steered clear of _that_ room. It was too soon. He wasn’t sure there would be a time when it wasn’t too soon. The guests came and went, peaking at New Year’s.

He received holiday greets from Ned, MJ, and even Bruce. His messages with Tony were constant. He felt a kinship that he hadn’t felt since that Labor Day when he would follow the elder wherever he went. Looking back on it, he wondered how he hadn’t annoyed the man to the point of repulsion. He told him this one day in a message.

Tony, 0202pm: Oh, you did. Why do you think I went into town for business every afternoon? They have a lovely coffee shop that’s nice and quiet x

Peter, 0229pm: Oh god I feel so embarrassed…

Tony, 0230pm: Don’t. If I wasn’t so blind, I would’ve seen you for what you were sooner.

Tony, 0231pm: Now, I miss that chattering of yours x

Peter, 0235pm: Well I could always call you x

Tony, 0236pm: Please do.

And so, their nightly phone calls began.

They would shoot the breeze, talk about each other’s days, how everyone was. The conversation would always turn to La Mer and reminiscing their days walking in the mornings and fishing in the evenings. It hadn’t been a long two weeks, but it had left its footprint in their memories. They especially laughed over Peter’s behavior on the beach during the Labor Day bash, and Tony admitted to being insanely jealous.

One night, Tony called to tell him the good news.

“We’ve decided on a name,” Tony said happily into the phone.

Peter smiled at the man’s uplifted tone. “Yeah?”

“We’re naming her Morgan Howard Stark.” The man sounded like he was holding his breath waiting for Peter’s reaction.

“Morgan?”

“Yeah, it’s unisex. Means sea-born, sea-song, or sea-defender. It can even mean Sea Chief. Howard is after my father. I always said I would give my son my father’s middle name, but we may not have any more children. So, we thought we would play it safe.”

“Any significance behind Morgan?”

“No. Just a good, strong name.”

“Sure is.”

⸎

He needed to talk to Peter.


	6. Melting Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony comes over. Peter makes a decision....

Happy didn’t begrudge him when he sat in the front this time. He supposed the man still felt bad about hassling him on their previous car ride. Plus, there was something going on between his aunt and Tony’s head of security. There was a change in dynamic as the man knew May adored Peter and wouldn’t take maltreatment towards Peter. That or he was finally not holding Tony over his head again.

This, however, was unlikely. Peter was the problem in his boss’s life, therefore a problem to him. The man was attempting conversation which came off a bit forced, he was trying here, even retrieved Peter’s bag from the trunk though Peter said he could take care of it. Happy patted his shoulder awkwardly, and Peter went inside.

Only a few minutes had passed, and he was busy catching up with Ned in the living room when he received a text from Tony Stark himself. His heart raced at the words. Just friends, just friends, just friends. Doesn’t mean anything. Just two dudes hanging out.

Tony, 0421pm: Can I come over?

Peter, 0422pm: Sure. Ned’s here tho

Tony, 0422pm: Good. Means we’ll keep it PG

Tony, 0423pm: x

Peter’s heart pounded at the idea of it not being PG if it weren’t for Ned’s presence. It meant Tony was very much still into him the way he was very much still into Tony. The only thing that would keep them from being inappropriate was his best friend’s presence in the next room.

Tony, 0427pm: We need to talk. There are things that need to be said in person.

Peter, 0427pm: Now I’m nervous

Tony, 0430pm: Don’t be. It’s just me.

Peter, 0431pm: There is no “just” you. You’re everything

Tony, 0446pm: Omw x

Peter, 0446pm: I don’t think I’ve ever seen you use abbreviations

Peter, 0447pm: It’s kinda disconcerting

Peter, 0448pm: x

Ned was eyeing them suspiciously from the couch. Peter and Tony could hear the tapping of fingers moving rapidly across a screen, Ned and MJ were no doubt having a texting war over this. Peter rolled his eyes and led Tony down the hallway to his bedroom.

Tony stopped in the doorway taking everything in, reverence in his eyes. This was Peter’s personal space. La Mer came back to him. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply; the younger’s scent strong in the small space. There was a bookshelf but smaller than the one at La Mer. The books were more mature judging by the less colorful spines. His hands were shaking; he needed something to occupy them, so he pulled out a random book and flipped through it.

Peter sat down on his bed and watched the elder. He looked tired and like he needed a hug although he didn’t think he should be the one to give it. “Why don’t you have a seat?” He patted the space next to him.

The other felt conflicted. “Not the bed,” Tony finally said and pulled out the chair at the other’s desk and sat down. They regarded each other. Now, that Tony was here, he wasn’t sure how he wanted to communicate the things he was feeling.

“Who’s Steve? I mean, really.”

“Whoo, Right into it.” Tony shifted his gaze to the floor then the ceiling unsure whether to begin. These were feelings he hadn’t spoken aloud to anyone but Rhodey, and even then, he hadn’t been completely honest.

“I won’t compete with his memory. You’re clearly still hung up on him.”

“So, are we doing this then?”

“We’re just friends.”

“Then what is there to compete with?”

“So, you and Steve were a thing.”

Tony scoffed. “Yeah, a ‘thing’.”

“You loved him.”

Tony stared at his hands, a lump in his throat. “Yeah,” he said quietly than met the younger man’s eyes. He was surprised to see there wasn’t judgment there, just compassion. Not even an ounce of jealous. “If you keep looking at me like that, I’m going to kiss you.”

“Maybe I want you to,” Peter admitted boldly. “If we’re being honest with each other.”

Tony gestured to the space in front of him with both hands, “This is my soul.”

Peter didn’t kiss him, though. “Tell me about him.”

Tony laughed and crossed his arms. But Peter was completely serious. “You really want to hear this?”

“It needs to be said. You need to say it.”

“What can I say,” he gestured with a hand. “I was in love with him.”

“I know,” Peter replied softly, smiling in encouragement.

“I loved him. He was the first man I had been with. My whole life, I’ve been in denial about who I really am. My dad wasn’t too encouraging about me accepting my identity, just kept repeating how unnatural it was when I expressed my concerns to him. He told me it would be better to keep any thoughts like that to myself going forward.”

“That’s awful,” Peter said softly.

“The thing is, though, is that Steve was more in the closet than I ever was, but he didn’t have family to go back to. He was orphaned. H- he lived with a family that was strictly Christian then went into the army straight out of high school. That’s where he met him. Barnes,” there was acid in his tone at the name. “Barnes was also an orphan, so they had something to bond over. Barnes went MIA, and Steve had looked and looked then finally left the army. Steve worked for me. He was my bodyguard because Happy was promoted to head of security.”

Peter raised his eyes at this new piece of information.

“Steve was there for me when Pepper left. I didn’t think he liked me. In fact, I thought he despised me.” Tony smiled, eyes far away, lost in the memory. His eyes came back into focus, and he stared intently into what felt like Peter’s soul. The boy was riveted. “I was not in a good way, lost without Pepper.” Steve’s words that night at the party drifted through Peter’s head, _He will always choose her over you. He can barely tie his shoes without her let alone handle a multibillion-dollar company._ “I think that’s what eventually drove us apart. That and James Buchanan Barnes.”

There wasn’t an ounce of acidity in is voice at saying the man’s full name. He said the name in fascination like he couldn’t believe that he had lost Steve to another man.

“Barnes owns a competing company. I don’t know if you’ve heard of it. Oscorp?” Peter nodded. “The true heir, Harry Osborn, commit suicide. Barnes had been adopted into the family, so he became the heir. It was in the news, and Steve went to go see him.” Tony sucked air in his cheeks, held it, then blew out. “The rest is history,”

They sat in silence for a while. Peter wanted to approach the man, hold him in his arms. Tony was deep in his head, wondering what things looked like going forward.

He broke the silence first. “Are you going to get back together with Bruce?”

Peter smiled sheepishly. “Probably.”

“Figures,” Tony said, tone biting.

Peter didn’t like that one bit but chose to ignore it and asked the first question he could think of. “When’s Pepper due?”

“When’s Pepper due,” Tony scoffed, “Trying to make me feel even shittier? May.”

“It was just a question,” Peter snapped. “And you don’t get a say over my relationship. You lost that right when you got married.”

“Oh, you finally said it!” Tony exclaimed jumping up then pacing over to the bookshelf again. He needed something to do with his hands. “Banner is dangerous, Peter.”

“Dangerous to your ego maybe.”

“I won’t always be around to pick you up from your boyfriend’s.”

“That was one time.” Then he said softly. “But you did. You came running when you thought Bruce had hurt me. Why, Tony?”

He knew Peter wanted him to say it. He wanted Tony to say he loved him. “I think you know why.”

That seemed to be enough to Peter because he changed the topic, voice considerably lighter. “Happy seemed to hit off with May.”

Tony smirked and raised an eyebrow. He played with the unraveling spine of a particularly old book.

“Your friend, from the party.”

Tony looked to the left, squinting as if to say. ‘You’re going to have to specify, I have a lot of friends.’

“On the way out someone stopped me, said he recognized me from a photo. Called me Tony’s Peter.”

Tony’s eyes popped open in surprise.

The corner of Peter’s mouth quirked up. “You have a photo of me, Tony?”

“Your aunt sent it to me.”

“Oh yeah, she said she’d do that.” Peter then sighed dreamily and lay back on his bed. Tony wished he wouldn’t do that. It made him want to climb on top of the boy. He repeated Rhodey’s words aloud, “Tony’s Peter. I like the sound of that.”

Tony’s mouth was dry. He knew Peter didn’t really want him now that he was a married man. He had even said it himself, that he didn’t want to be that person. But damn it if it wasn’t becoming harder and harder. Peter stretched and yawn emitting a high-pitched noise, and that was all Tony needed.

Peter opened his eyes dreamily when Tony’s weight shifted the bed as he sat down. “Stay with me?”

Was it meant to be a metaphor? Did the other want him to stay tonight or indefinitely?

The younger read the conflict in his eyes. “Just for tonight. We’re just friends.”

Tony laid back on the bed, unsure of the kid’s sudden change of tune. Peter curled into his side, and he relaxed, pulling the boy to him, an echo of that night on the sofa. It felt like a break in the clouds, light in the storm.

“Rub my back?”

He slipped his hand under Peter’s shirt who jumped at the sudden skin to skin contact. A quiet moan escaped his lips.

“I wanna be good tonight,” Peter murmured, rolling onto his stomach to hide his erection.

“You are good. That’s the problem.”

Peter’s eyes rolled back into his head. The lightest touch, so pleasurable. Without thinking, he rolled his hips into the bed.

“Ah,” Peter hissed. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

Tony’s hand didn’t stop moving. It was innocent like the foot massage. Peter could see it now that Tony’s conscience was clear because Tony wasn’t getting any pleasure, it was innocent, not intentional. This made Peter feel better about what he did next. 

He began moving his hips fast into the bed, undulating and whimpering.

“Need you, need you,” he whispered into the mattress. “Oh, ah… ah!”

He came hard, hips shaking sporadically. He should’ve been embarrassed, but he was numb to it. 

Tony’s eyes were intently watching to save this material for later. How Tony wanted to take his love into his arms and press into him, fuck into him. It took all of his restraint not to do so in the humid afterglow of Peter Parker’s orgasm. _Need you, need you_. Tony wanted to repeat the words back to him.

“You should leave. I’m afraid for you. I’m afraid for myself. I’m afraid of what this means.”

Ah, there it was the guilt.

Tony sighed and stood up. He was halfway to the door then turned around suddenly.

“Kid, I’m in if you are.”

Peter sat up and shook his head, “It’s wrong.”

“I don’t care.” When Peter protested, Tony held up his hands. “You don’t have to answer right now. Just think it over, Pete. I mean, look at us, we’re miserable!”

Peter put his head in hands in frustration. “Why can’t you just leave things the way they are?”

“The way they are? You mean, me touching you, and you coming in your pants thinking I’m not still cheating? There’s such a thing as emotional cheating. And I am very much emotionally cheating on Pepper with you. I don’t think there will ever be a time where I am not.”

“And what about Steve?”

“What about him?”

“If he came through the door right now and wanted you back, could you honestly say you wouldn’t go with him?”

“ _Fuck_ Steve!” He spat. “He _left_ me for another man! I was going to have children with him! Pepper was going to be our surrogate!”

“What?”

“Morgan’s biological father is Steve.”

“Excuse me?”

“There it is. Steve didn’t want the baby without me, and Pepper wasn’t getting any younger. I married Pepper so that I could have access to the child because I am not _capable_ of having them myself. And now Steve wants back in the picture.”

“That is really fucked up.” He couldn’t stop the words from spilling out of his mouth.

Tony opened the door and walked quickly into the hall. Peter jumped up and followed him out the door and down the stairs. A car pulled up; it was driverless. Holy shit.

“Tony, wait!”

“No! You’re either in this, or you’re not.” He turned back for a moment. “I need you to sign an NDA. I’ll send the paperwork.”

The car drove off leaving Peter standing there in shock. Whatthefuck, whatthefuck, whatthefuck.

⸎

It had been a long day for Tony. He felt emotionally strung out since his conversation with Peter a week before. The younger man was taking his time in giving his verdict. Tony wanted to say it didn’t matter, that he would still be the same person with or without Peter. But he wouldn’t be a whole person, and it wasn’t Peter’s fault that he wouldn’t be a whole person for his daughter, it was his own fault for always getting so deep every time. Maybe he hadn’t learned anything from Steve at all because now he was inextricably linked to the man through their future daughter. At least if he couldn’t be a whole man, there would still be Steve to make up for it.

Now that he didn’t need the man anymore, he was always going to be around with that stringy haired lover of his. _Barnes_.

“James Buchanan Barnes,” Tony mused aloud to himself. The name echoed around the lab walls. There wasn’t any particular feeling towards the man; perhaps he should be thankful to Barnes that he got away from the blonde soldier and met Peter in the first place. No, he didn’t have that kind of emotional maturity even at the ripe age of 49. That’s right, he would be turning 50 this year, much too old for an 18-year-old. Why did Peter even want him in the first place? What was the attraction? Was it the money? A daddy complex?

He had turned his phone onto ringer permanently in the hopes of catching a call from Peter even if in the middle of the night. Now he turned the ringer off scared that Peter would call, and he would spill all this information prematurely. What if Peter said yes? These vulnerable, uncertain thoughts built from the depths of sleeplessness and a previous self-doubt construed since childhood wouldn’t go away. Or would they?

In the back of his mind, he knew Peter Parker made him the vulnerable love-sappy mess that he was in that moment. He had built walls as a defense mechanism to deter people from seeing his true self. He, himself, had daddy issues. Maybe that was the attraction. Peter could relate to Tony over the lack of a male figure in his life and have Tony as that male figure. The best of both worlds.

Then, there was Happy’s judgmental face which would only get worse now that he was dating Peter’s aunt and would feel some sort of responsibility towards her nephew. And what about Rhodey who had been by his side while he sorted through every Peter-related meltdown, the man who was secretly proud that Tony had moved on from the young man. He was with Pepper now who was clearly the mature, the right option for Tony Stark.

Even his best friend was not friend enough to deal with the aftermath of a public announcement of Tony’s sexuality, maybe even felt his name would get tossed into the mix. Everything would become a question. How long had Tony Stark been homosexual? Every relationship that he had ever had with another male would be put under a microscope, and that wasn’t fair to Rhodey even if the military were a bit more accepting towards this group of people.

It was this introspection that was the primary cause for missing Peter’s phone call; that and the ringer was off. He registered the glowing screen in the corner of his eye just a little too late. He stared at the phone where it lay for some time, jumping when the voicemail notification popped up.

“Jesus Christ,” Tony whispered clutching his chest imagining a waddling Pepper finding his limp body after suffering a heart attack. He breathed in shakily. “I can do this. I can do this. Just press play, Stark.”

Voicemail, Peter Parker, 0231am: “Hey, Tony. It’s Peter uh Parker, but of course, you know that already. I’m assuming you have my number saved into your phone unless you’re ignoring me. Which would be fine, too, since I’ve waited so long to call.” The sweet voice of Peter Parker filled his brain and sent waves of contradicting feelings into his stomach. Butterflies, nausea? The boy was rambling, nervous.

“This situation is fucked up. N-no, I didn’t mean that! I’m not saying you’re fucked up. I’m just saying the situation- This situation is unconventional. I know you think I don’t understand that I couldn’t possibly, and you would be right. I don’t know what it feels like to be your age, not that your age is old. Y-you’re perfect Mr. Stark. Tony.” A deep breath. Tony could imagine the boy trying to calm his nerves in his bedroom. The calmer words that followed were a testimony to this. “I don’t have the right to judge you, and I’m going to look at this as openly as possible.” This part was steady, then a deep breath. Tony’s heart pounded in anticipation for the final verdict. 

“What I’m trying to say is: I’m in.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double upload tonight! Going straight into Part 3, Where do you go?
> 
> Also, there will be a fourth and fifth part! The fifth will be the final.  
> I hope you have liked this series so far, and as always, thanks for reading! <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! What do you think so far?


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